Some Play to Win

(E is # 11 - the boy in the orange penny is the other kid who had to sat out - all so the coach could get his win.)

Friday night was E's (almost) last soccer game - ever. He has played on a competition league team for the past 2 years and has done really well. He is by no means the best player on the team, but he really does have a talent for soccer - when his heart is in it. This half of the season his heart just hasn't been in it. I am sure part of it is him, but I think a lot has to do with his coach. It really saddens me that an adult can act this way. Friday was the semi-finals for a small tournament he was in. He played maybe 10 min. of the first half - which I didn't think anything of. The team was down 1-0. So started the second half, and then ended the second half. E didn't get on the field at all. The coach didn't play him and one other player at all. The game went into overtime with the score tied at 2. E and the same boy didn't get into the overtime either. They won the game 3-2. But, the coach got his win. My blood was boiling. After the game I went and told E that he had a good game and he just looked up at me with tears in his eyes like I had said the most ridiculous thing in the world. My heart hurt so bad for him. I wanted to walk right up to that coach and kick him in the groin. We stayed for a parents meeting after the game and then the 2 of us walked silently back to the car. I called John to let him know how the game went and what happened (John was working late). After I hung up the phone with John, E and I had this conversation:

E: Mom. I know why I didn't play.

me: Why, hon?

E: well, Justus said that we played terrible the first half. So, he had to play the best players on the team, and the worst players had to stay out - so he could win.

me: Do you think you're the worst player on the team?

E: Yes.

me: Why do you think that? (As if I needed to ask)

E: *silent*

me: You're not E. Sometimes life isn't fair. There isn't an explanation for it. It's just the way it is sometimes. (I couldn't come up with anything better than that??)

E: *silent*

Now, I am sure the coach did not tell E he was the worst player on the team. But, this is the way his 9 year old mind interpreted and made sense of what happened to him and the other boy. I cannot put into words how angry and hurt I felt for my son. The next morning was his last game and I sent John and E together without me. I know some of you won't agree with this action, but I couldn't take another game like the night before. I can't believe E even went. But, this just shows what an amazing person he is. He went, he played and played hard for his team.

He had been going back and forth all season long about whether or not he wanted to try out for soccer again or try football or Lacrosse. Now, whatever doubts he had about soccer were solidified on Friday night. Saturday after his last game he ecstatically told John he was so glad the season was over and he couldn't wait to try something else.

The picture above is how he looked by the end of the game. When I see this picture and think of what effect this game had on my son I feel sick and proud at the same time. He is a bigger person than his coach. He is the example to his coach - and his coach can't even see it. It is sad what some adults will do to win. Well, his coach won indeed.